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Starting Where I'm at..

The pressure to perform has never been more pressing. I created this blog 5 years ago to be a place where I could escape the confines of social media to lessen the pressure of posting without being pressured into posting trending, popular or commercial content. And yet, I still caved under the pressure of not having the credentials to post on my own blog or the expertise to write attention-commanding literature. But the truth of that is that I just didn't have the confidence or even the carelessness to begin. Carelessness being the ability to let go of other people's expectations and lessen the expectations I held for myself.

After all this time, I have learned finally learned a grand lesson. I will never ever truly be ready for anything that I have never done before and yet, everything that has tested me in this life has failed to defeat me. I'm not just surviving in this life–I'm thriving. Doing more of what I love and doing it as often as I love to do it. Why? Because I have finally consciously had the courage to begin. I'm taking the first step of many to come. I'm not worrying about who's watching or what they're saying. I owe it to myself to begin because I simply desire to. I want to improve myself, and the fear of failing to live up to unrealistic expectations has caused me to stifle my own progress. And so it's time that I open my eyes to the truth. Mistakes are good. Great, even! There is no better teacher than a failed attempt and no loser when the competition is internal.

I no longer desire to compete for prizes I don't truly value for a world that fails to truly value me. My worth is in my own hands and if all that I do is spend my life trying to show it then I have spent my life honestly in pursuit of simply wanting to be a part of the world that is spiritually and physically a part of me. I deserve to take up space as a living breathing human of planet Earth.

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